Wild Things
by LegolasLover2003
Summary: Written in honor of Dominic Monaghan's new tv show "Wild Things", this story is a short one-shot drabble about Merry and Pippin camping, post-LOTR, and a prank that the elder Hobbit plays on his Took cousin... with the help of a rather large snake.


**Title:** _"Wild Things"_

**Author: **LegolasLover2003 aka Ashley

**Category: **Book - _"Lord of the Rings"_

**Genre: **General

**Rating:**

**Disclaimer: **I do not own any rights to _"The Lord of the Rings"_. I just adore it to pieces!

**NOTE:** This story written in honor of the BBCAmerica premiere of Dominic Monaghan's (Meriadoc "Merry" Brandybuck) nature show "_Wild Things with Dominic Monaghan_" today, this Tuesday the 22nd, 2013 at 9:00 pm US CST.

* * *

**Wild Things**

* * *

Fires were odd things when you thought about them. They spun and danced and flickered and breathed like tiny little people with minds of their own. Sometimes they got quite angry and spat sparks at your bare feet, and sometimes they seemed rather sad and retreated into the ground, glowing and brooding as embers are want to do.

And yet fires were one of the most magnificent things that Pippin could think of in this whole green world. They could burn and destroy, but they could bring life as well. Cold toes, after all, enjoy a warm fire just as much as frozen fingers like a cup of hot tea on a blustery rainy dreary day. Magic could be wrought from fires, and fires could consume magic in their own right, as was evidenced by a first hand account from his second cousin Frodo Baggins. But there were many a good thing that fires could do that were not so harmful nor heroic. For instance, and perhaps Pippin's favorite reasoning for the magnificence of fires, was that it could take something as common as a plant and turn it into the finest pipeweed in the Southfarthing... Longbottom Leaf. Of which, consequently, he was smoking at that very moment. The Took's second favorite reasoning in favor of fires, easily had to be that without them, nothing would get cooked, leastways not cooked properly since you could in essence let a hot afternoon sun fry an egg if you had the time and the patience, which he tended to have little of on both accounts.

After all of this thought of the little fire before him, Pippin was just poking the sausage and crispy bacon in the skillet with a stick when his cousin Merry finally reappeared around the bend just a little ways off, carrying a great many more sticks with which they could keep their fire happy and fed... and keep their bedrolls clean and clear of all manner of creeping things which like to crawl up against a warm body in the dead of night.

The two Hobbits were camping, and while both, for a time, had thought that perhaps they had had quite enough of staying out of doors under the stars... they had then soon come to realize that as time wore on, as it always did, both Took and Brandybuck simply could not shake the want of the road and nowadays found themselves seeking the edges of the Old Forest more often than the taverns of Hobbiton.

"You're gonna drop that." Pippin pipped up, pointing to his cousin with tonight's cooking stick in hand.

And drop it he did, though not from accident but in an manner full of purpose. The pile of twigs and small branches flopped here and there and clattered onto the forest floor. "Next time, Pip... I cook... you get the firewood."

Smiling, his smoking pipe tucked into the corner of his mouth, the Took returned to poking and prodding supper while Merry stooped to stack the firewood that was now strewn every which way.

"Did ya find any mushrooms?" the younger Hobbit asked, quite hoping his cousin had.

But Merry shook his head, "No. And I'm not likely to find any either. Isn't wet enough this season. But..." sitting back, the Brandybuck lets his toes get a bit toasty near the fire as he wiped his hands off on his trousers. "I've got a good store of them at the hall so once we get back we can roast a few. Though I think I'm more in the mood for a good mushroom stew or soup than one or two,"

"Or twenty?" Pippin cut in with a grin.

"Roasted ones..." Merry finished his sentence, pulling his pipe from his belt and his leaf pouch from his inner vest pocket.

Before long the Master of Buckland was blowing smoke rings and a contest had begun, as tended to happen more often than not, between the two cousins. Such a test of talents however, only lasted as long as it took for supper to be ready, at which time the Hobbits put away their pipes and tucked in happily.

It was hours later, though neither Hobbit could have told you how much time had passed, when the warm fully-fed little fire began to burn low. It's happiness, it seemed, was turning sour and the sad disposition of the flames gave way to heated embers, glowing in the dark. Pippin pondered that perhaps the fire needed a spot of dessert and reached to grab a few sticks to help it on it's way. Only... there were no more sticks to grab. This presented a problem and at first, the Took thought to have his cousin fetch another arm load. But by now, it seemed, Merry had retreated into the boughs of a tree overlooking their campsite, and was much enjoying the relaxing sounds of the forest at night, one hairy foot swinging back and forth as he half-hummed to himself.

Much can be said about the queerness of Brandybucks, and much has been said before, but it was one thing that Peregrin had never quite understood about Meriadoc. Trees. Well no there were other things as well like boating and herb lore and a curious admiration for the creepy and the crawly, but right now it was trees that the Thain found himself thinking about. Frodo in his younger years certainly had a mind to go up a tree every now and then, and of course that seemed quite normal to the folk of Buckland, but most decent Hobbits thought it very odd and equally as strange and wouldn't be caught dead that high off the ground unless dire need called for it. Pippin didn't care either which way to be honest, but after spending much time on the shoulders of an Ent, the Took really didn't think he needed to feel bark under his backside again... if he could help it of course.

So, seeing his cousin happy in the nature about them, the younger Hobbit stood up and dusted off his trousers, before heading down the trail a piece to search for some dessert to feed their fine little fire.

Merry noticed his cousin's departure of course and smiled to himself, thinking it rather clever that he had gotten out of having to fetch more wood. Bad luck to call a Brandybuck from a tree, as it was generally considered. So the Master of Buckland had the small glen all to himself for the time being, his eyes falling on the dying fire then back into the treetops and the stars beyond. Of course the stars were bright but the area for gazing at them wasn't quite as open as he would have liked. Nothing like star gazing in Rohan, of which he'd done a fair share of when given the time. Men weren't what Merry would call 'tree-loving-folk' as could be rightly seen, nor were Dwarves. Elves were of course, Silvan more often than any of the others, as were Ents since they, in themselves, were very closely related to the trees in their care. But Hobbits didn't really seem to have, overall, any big opinions about trees and so while there were fewer trees in The Shire than in the Old Forest, there were fewer still in Rohan about Edoras, and that made it wonderful star-gazing countryside as far as Merry was concerned.

He had just started to day-dream, or perhaps evening-dream would've been a better word since day had fled hours ago, when there was a curious tickling at his ear. Thinking it a fly or some other very small nuisance, the Hobbit flicked at his pointed ear and the hair about it and then simply returned his attention to the night sky. But the tickling came again once, then twice in almost rapid succession. Curious now, Merry turned his head to see a very large, by Hobbit standards of course, green snake hanging onto a branch beside him with most of it's body, while it's serpentine head hovered very near the Hobbit's ear.

"Enough of that now, Mister Snake." the Master of Buckland spoke plainly, wagging a finger at the creature in admonishment. "I'm spoken for, thank you kindly. I'll not have your kisses tickling my ear this night." he said, clearly thinking the matter to be settled.

But it seemed that the snake had other plans and, this time, moved it's scaled body forward, resting it's head just on top of Merry's curly hair. This of course made the poor Hobbit cross-eyed as he looked up to see, every now and again, a forked black tongue dart out over his brows as the snake made itself comfortable.

"I'm hardly a feather pillow." Meriadoc sighed, reaching his hands up to try and convince the creature of his words... but it seemed that the serpent was quite happy by now, as was evidenced by it's body moving along toward it's large head.

This of course did nothing to help the situation and, in fact, made matters worse. The snake's weight unbalanced the Hobbit then, sending both he and the creature tumbling from the tree in a pile. Luckily for the serpent, it landed on top of the Master of Buckland.

With a sigh, spitting leaves and dried bits of grass from his lips, Merry hauled himself up out from under the snake and wiped his hands on his trousers, looking down at the creature that slithered toward him and curled up near his hairy toes. "You really are troublesome, aren't you?" Merry asked, to which he thought he heard a distinct 'hiss' of agreement.

It was at about this time though that a wonderfully cleaver idea came to the Hobbit and he laughed, rubbing his hands together conspiratorially. Picking up the large snake, Merry walked over to the bedrolls of himself and his cousin, both having been lain out in preparation for sleep later, which were nestled quite close to the now dozing little fire.

"Now, if you'll be so kind as to stay put for a bit, I'll promise you a nice warm spot to sleep tonight, Mister Snake." Merry said with a wink at the serpent in his arms.

Carefully he crouched down low, un-tucking Pippin's bedroll and carefully laying the great creature in place atop the cloth... before, of course, covering him up nice and warm-like and scrambling back up into the tree... as if nothing had ever happened.

An hour later, there was a shriek to be heard throughout the Shire and the Old Forest that had not been heard since a wayward party firework, designed by Gandalf himself, had rocketed into the sky, and destroyed a party pavilion mind you, after two unfortunate cousins had tried to set it off themselves.

For Merry, he would never forget the look on his younger cousin's face when the Took found a giant snake curled up about his toes in his own bedroll.

And for Pippin, who fell prey to the rather harmless albeit frightening practical joke, he'd get his cousin back for the tasteful trick and the laugh it'd given them... all in good time.

* * *

**THE END**

* * *

**Author's Note:  
**- So this story I got the idea for after watching the Sneak Peek of "Wild Things with Dominic Monaghan" back on Saturday. I told myself I was going to write a short drabble of a oneshot about Merry and Pippin wherein Merry puts a snake in Pippin's bedroll. This was the result. Hope you guys enjoy!

* * *

**Muse Moments:**  
Legolas yawns, staring up at the ceiling while Nil is poking him on the shoulder as they wait for 9:00pm to roll around.  
"I wanna see Dom nowwwww..." Nil sighs, glancing at the clock, but it's not even 6:00pm yet.  
The Elf shrugs slightly, "Patience. Good things come to those who wait, correct?"  
"I suppose so..."  
Beside them, Paris has fallen asleep waiting and on the floor both Elladan and Elrohir are playing a game of Go Fish. Aragorn can be heard in the kitchen making a snack with Thranduil's help.  
Nil sighs again. "Come on, 9... I needs the Dom..."


End file.
